What the F#@k is That Dog?: Zelda’s Results Are In

Back in September, I wrote an article asking for ideas on my personal pound puppy, Zelda’s, breed mixture. I also ordered a DNA test, so we could all have an answer to the mystery. I woke up this morning to an email from Wisdom Panel – Zelda’s results were in! (Disclaimer: I got sidetracked and took over two months to actually send the test in.) As I lay in bed with Princess Ruto Kissy-Face, I opened up my results document eagerly.

And… drumroll… … … Zelda is a Bull Terrier.

Wait, what did you say? I didn’t hear you, can you repeat that please?

 

Right. Um. No shit, Sherlock.

To be exact (haha, like what I did there?), she is a Bull Terrier, mixed with Miniature Bull Terrier, mixed with Bull Terrier, mixed with something. Thanks, Wisdom Panel.

Oh, I’m just giving Wisdom Panel a hard time. This isn’t an exact science, I know that. Honestly, I was genuinely surprised by these results. I knew Bull Terrier was in there, but I assumed we were looking at a completely separate breed for the other side. Let’s take a look at her results!

 

So, my first assumption is that the left hand side is Mama Mia, because we know she’s a purebred Bull Terrier. Even the DNA tests cannot always identify purebred lineage, which makes sense because every dog breed is a hodge-podge of other breeds. According to this, then, Daddy is a Bull Terrier mix.

Now, we could also ask ourselves another question. Was Mama Mia a purebred? Or, perhaps, was she a very high content mix? Mia was surrendered to the City shelter by her “owner” when she was in labor with Zelda and her brother, because she “scratched” a teenager during labor. An even creepier question – was Zelda’s daddy also her grandpa? Frankly, it wouldn’t surprise me one bit knowing backyard breeders around here; I’ve definitely seen worse.

Moving on. What insight does Wisdom Panel give us about Miss Zelda?

 

Do I recognize any Bull Terrier traits in Zelda? Hmm. Intelligent, active, strong, friendly – yep, we’re good there. Reward-based training sounds about right (I think they could have worded that differently, though – maybe something like, “Stubborn as shit unless you really make them want it.”). She’s actually very friendly with strangers, but she’s a giant bitch to other dogs she doesn’t respect.

 

“May not get along well with other dogs.” Zelda loves other dogs. Unless, of course, they go near something she thinks is hers, and that list seems to grow every day. She will share all day with her pack, but “guest” dogs and cats will fall victim quickly to her resource guarding. We’re working on it.

 

Then there’s this. Wisdom Panel does preface it with a very clear warning that these other breeds may not exist at all in the dog’s background, but then, they may. I could be convinced that she has retriever somewhere in her background, but if anyone ever even so much as mentions that she’s part Pug, I’ll shank you.

So, there you have it. Zelda is a Bull Terrier/Miniature Bull Terrier mix. I’m glad we have an enlightening answer to the mystery of the Imp Princess. Now, Wisdom Panel has offered me $15 off a second test if I want one… maybe Cady is next?